The mom I thought I would be
When I was 24 and pregnant with my firt son, I had so many ideas of the mom I would be.
And they were all wrong!
It may suprise you to read that I wanted to be a working mother. I dont know that that is the norm at our current time. I had visions of going to my amazing job and contributing to my household monetarily. Until I had to take him to daycare for the first time.
I remember the first time he came down with an ear infection – and I was faced the with the wrecking mom guilt again. Because I had to work (and I did have to) I had to take this perfect sweet, amazing blonde baby to daycare and subject him to germs and other people’s care. I was continuously having to choose between my primal instict as a mother and helping provide for my family. It sucked.
Fast forward to having a 7 month old and SURPRISE I’m pregnant again. Two kids in 15 months – I cried! Now I would have to haul two of them into daycare, twice as much sickness, twice as much in daycare payments. I had never wanted to be a stay at home more in my entire life. The thought was laughable, really. Did I posses that much sanity to actually even do that job?
After the birth of our younger son, I landed myself this glorious job as a stay home mom! It’s the last thing I ever thought I would want. But here I am, doing the SAHM life. Boogers, poop, playdates, sports, snacks..you name it!
The second part of who I thought I would be as a mom. It’s the things my husband and I said – no coke, candy, “oh my kids will be so well-behaved”. I literally laughed out loud just now. Thats a negative ghost rider. (As they are currently running around in their underwear acting like ninjas. And I cant even recall when the last time I fed them was. Whoops! Momfail.)
My boys have to have their morning caffiene and sometimes I just open the pantry in the mornings for them to pick whatever it is they want just to save myself the headache. Fruit snacks are good for you, right?
The moral of my story is that no matter what you “thought” you’d be is usually (or in my case) completely and totally wrong.
But one thing is for certain. We’re all barely surviving no matter what kind of mom you are. You’re never alone. Literally, there’s always probably someone in the bathroom with you. May the force be with you!
Meghan Sit Goodman, Mom of 2 and Owner of Glowing Tan